‘Unpacking’ Essentials for the Ideal Vacation
Picture this: You’re in your ideal vacation destination. Playing and relaxing with those you most want to be with. Upon arrival, you instantly feel at peace, with nary a concern about anything happening anywhere else. The week or two ahead is filled with only activities of your choosing. Nothing else matters. Imagine how you’ll feel after returning from this vacation. What energy and attitude will you bring back to the people and responsibilities awaiting your return?
If you’re like most people, attaining such an idyllic getaway is difficult. Even those who can afford to escape to luxury vacations are often plagued by the challenges of leaving work behind. Thoughts of staying ‘caught up’ with never-ending emails, social media happenings, and news too often occupy space in our minds…minds which seem incapable of shutting off. If you’ve had a vacation like this, you might recall returning home, wistful for having missed what you wished had been a more restorative getaway. You might even have chalked it up to the demands of your high-pressure job, life responsibilities, or the importance of being you, and concluded that there just wasn’t another option.
One of the best gifts we can give ourselves and the world to which we return is unabashedly pure down time. No responsibility time. Wide open wonder, wander and explore time. We can’t plan for the insights and renewal that will occur when we allow ourselves this kind of time. We can only trust that they will happen.
Laying down responsibilities and identities that are entangled in work output, familial roles and perceived societal expectations can be challenging, and maybe even be scary. It requires conscious intention and a bit of preparation, but is well worth doing.
So, how do you go about setting yourself up for this ideal vacation? Start with unpacking. Be intentional about what you need to leave behind so that you can have a restorative break. The key is to plan ahead, downshift before you go, and use your self-command muscles to enhance sensory presence while you’re away.
Strategies like auto-reply email, turning off social media and news apps on your phone, which you likely know about and may already use. Decide ahead of time how much you want to be plugged in and be clear with boundaries you set for yourself. Unplugging completely and having a no-check rule is ideal. If that’s not doable for you, pre-decide and stick to whatever rules you set. Know that you are protecting your peace of mind.
That same rule applies to delegating tasks. Trust that whomever you’ve delegated work projects, pet care, or plant care to is perfectly capable or you wouldn’t have chosen them. If child or parental care are part of what your leaving behind, plan scheduled check-ins as needed, but set yourself free from the expectation that you’ll be available to repeated texting.
In the week leading up to your departure, schedule time for larger projects early in the week. This will give you time to tie up loose ends without feeling rushed and will send your brain a signal that you’re preparing to leave work behind. This form of downshifting makes it much easier to step away without worrying about what you didn’t get to.
Continue downshifting in the days leading up to your vacation by doing what you can to slow down. The less frenzied you are when you begin your vacation, the sooner you’ll be able to shift into a relaxed state.
Once there, use your self-command muscles to stay present by focusing your awareness on one sense at a time. If a thought about work or home responsibilities enters your mind, choose to focus instead on the beauty of your surroundings, the sounds of nature, the taste of food, or the feeling of moving your body.
For most of us, restorative breaks like this come too infrequently. Preparing yourself for a much-deserved vacation will help you have a richer experience while there. The gift of your renewed presence when you return home will be priceless, something you and others will appreciate for weeks, if not months ahead.
“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.”
– Pema Chodron